Kisses

Not doing too bad.  Overnights seems to be the worst on how I am feeling physically.  This round isn't definitely not as bad as the first round.  I am very tired though.  I am happy to be half way done.

I was getting Sean ready for bed last night on his changing table.  He reaches over, grabs my head, pulls it down and gives me a big kiss on the top of my bald head and hugs me.  He says, "I like your hair, Mommy."  Cute, considering I don't have any, but it just melted my heart.  He then continued to give me more kisses.  It's nice to see it not bothering him.  We haven't made a big deal out of it, so I guess he won't either.

Interesting to be bald

I can now see lots of scalp.  The little pieces of hair have mainly fallen out on top.  I have a little on the sides and back.  Rob thinks it is funny that he can pull out the little hairs with ease.  At least my hats aren't pulling on the little hairs.  It is a little more comfortable.

We went food shopping today in the rain  We also had a nice day with Sean.  Rob made brisket for dinner and Sean was so happy to have a chocolate chip cookie for dessert.  We listened were music and when Careless Whisper came on, Rob said, "yucky" and Sean said, "It's for dancing." and he started bopping back and forth.

Good day.


Tomorrow, I start my meds for my 2nd chemo treatment on Monday. I will half way done as of Monday!

Fabulously Bald

On Sunday, my hair started falling out from the chemo.  I got a bad headache before it started and my hair felt heavy.  I thought it was funny that I could just pull out handfuls of hair.  It was really weird.  I decided on Monday for Rob to shave my head.  We were going to have Sean help.  He watched a bit, but wasn't too interested.  He decided to read some books and keep crawling under the tripod since we were also video taping it.  It took a while because we were using Rob's mustache trimmer.  It worked though.  Rob tried giving me a mohawk first.  It wasn't too successful.  He also saved his favorite curl for last.  On Friday, I am going to get my wig fitted.

Getting started:

Rob attempting a mohawk: 

One Curl to Go:

All Done:

Short Hair

Very weird with the short hair.  When I went to wash it yesterday, I forgot how short it was and put the amount of shampoo I usually use on my long hair.  It was way too much.  The haircut is ok.  I am not crazy about it.  I think it is too long on the sides and it is hitting my ears, so I am putting in barrettes to pull it off my face.  It's not worth going back to get it fixed, since I will only have it for 3-4 weeks.

The belly wound is looking ok.  It doesn't seem to be opening this time.  The plastic surgeon put in a lot of stitches. It is going to take a long time to heal, especially when I start the chemo on Monday.

New Haircut and New Wig

Big day today.  My belly was still hurting from all the pulling and stitching, but nothing a little percocet couldn't fix.  My mom and dad picked me up for my haircut.  The hairdresser put my hair in a ponytail and snipped.  She was only able to get 6 inches, so it is too short to donate to Locks of Love.  I am a little disappointed at that.  I got my haircut.  I think I more like my sister now.  The cut is a little longer than I was thinking of getting, but my hairdresser said to come back in a few weeks to get a shorter one before I shave/lose it.  It feels very light and weird.

Here is the before and after:

We then went to find a wig.  The place was very nice.  Since they took insurance I didn't have to lay out anything for the wig, an added plus.

Meet Shirley:

It was hard to try on the wigs with all my hair, but we got a decent idea on the look.  The lady said that they do not make many curly wigs because it is not the style right now.  I have to go back for a fitting when I lose my hair and she will trim the wig to fit my face.

I was also able to get a prosthesis for my breast, since it is not fully formed yet and the plastic surgeon is not fixing my breasts until after my chemo is finished.  I am happy with how it now looks.





The day wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be.  Thanks to everyone who posted thoughts and encouragement on Facebook.  It was nice to see all the comments.  Rob & Sean are not home yet.  It will be interesting to hear what Sean will say about it.  I know Rob was disappointed about me getting my haircut, but he would rather have me bald and healthy, then with a head full of hair.  I think the wig might freak him out in the middle of the night, especially since it will be sitting on my makeup table in the bedroom.  Hopefully the cats won't find it a new plaything.

I still have a way to go, but the finish line is getting closer.

All Sewn Up Again

I went to the plastic surgeon again today.  He decided to close up everything.  He said he wasn't surprised that a few stitches had opened.  He liked the progress of the areas that were closed.  It took about an hour to reclose the wound and he did a nice job.  I know, after the chemo is done, I might need some touch up work, but I still have to have my breasts finished also.  His objective today was to get it closed, even if it did not look pretty. The belly is a little sore from today's work, but I am still having a problem with one of the nerves that runs from the incision up my belly.  I don't know if I had mentioned it before, but is the source of most of my pain and lack of movement.  The right side of my belly burns from the nerve being oversensitive. Hopefully now that the wound is closed, the nerve can heal.  He is having me massage the areas 5 times a day to desensitize it.

I am also able to get rid of the visiting nurse.  She was coming every day while the wound was open and 3 times a week when Fred was attached.  I found out the other day that I was getting charged $40 co-pay on every visit.  The total bill is probably going to be about $1000...blech.  I am trying to work out a payment plan with them, since I am still unemployed.  The doctor said that I can email him a picture of the wound everyday so he can keep an eye on it instead of the visiting nurse for infection.  If any stitches open up or there are any problems, he will give me and Rob something easy to do so we don't have to get the nurse back.

The doctor gave the ok to start chemo on Monday.  He said even though I am closed, it will still take a long time for the wound to fully heal and to expect that.  Chemo delays healing.  I am glad thought I can finally get that started.  My chemo will be every 3 weeks and I will be having 4 treatments.

Tomorrow, I am getting my haircut finally.  I will post pics tomorrow.

Belly Problems Again

The visiting nurse was just here and we measured the wound on my belly and it definitely opened more, which I knew already. The center opening is now 5cm by 2cm and one of the side ones is 5cm by 1cm. We called the plastic surgeon and he wasn't surprised about it opening and losing stitches. He wants to see me tomorrow, so I changed my haircut appointment for Wednesday.

I am still hoping to start the chemo on Monday.

Happy Valentine's Day

I had a very nice Valentine's day.  Rob cooked us a wonderful dinner of filet mignon with a port wine reduction, scallops and roasted asparagus.  We had chocolate mousse cake with champagne for dessert.  We don't normally exchange presents, but he got me some this year.  He got me a pair of green gem butterfly earrings and two t-shirts. Some might not find the t-shirts romantic, but it is what they said.

 

 

He also got one for himself.

I am thinking about going to see the doctor on Tuesday, since he has office hours then for him to see the wound instead of waiting until Thursday and having the nurse look at it.  If he doesn't see it and there is a problem on Thursday, it could delay my chemo.  I will probably get my haircut and my wig on Wednesday now.

One of Those Days

I feel blah today. I guess I should expect to have some down days. It being so grey and cold out isn't helping. I hate being stuck in the house and still having this wound vacuum attached. I can leave, but I still don't have a lot of my strength back to do it by myself. I try to think only about today, but it's hard not to think about how much longer I have with treatments.

My mom made an appointment for me for Tuesday to get my hair cut short. My Mom and sister are coming with me. Then we are going to a wig shop to pick one out for me before I lose my hair. At least my health insurance is paying for a wig and there is no price limit, so I can get a very nice one.

Tomorrow, Rob and I decided to get a family portrait done. He wanted a nice one of the three of us and me with my long hair. I know hair grows back, but a nice portrait will be nice. Hopefully the snow won't be so bad. We have a morning appointment, then Sean can play in the snow in the afternoon.

I called the plastic surgeon to find out my surgery time and found out that they are going to do the closure in the office. I am so happy that I don't have it done in the hospital. He is still going to make me sleepy, so I don't have to know what he is doing. That will be nice. They are hopefully going to call soon with the day and time for next week.