Sean & Mommy

As you can see, my hair is growing back in.  I kind of like it.

Getting there

I saw the nurse practitioner on Monday and she likes how my belly is healing.  Last time, they gave me new packing to use in the wound and it seems to be making the opening heal better.  It is definitely a slow process.  Also she said there isn't enough skin to actually close the opening, so we will have to wait for it to close naturally.  I hope after the chemo is done that it will speed up a bit.


Sean said again that he likes my scratchy head.  I asked him if he wanted a haircut like mommy's and he said no.  He just like rubbing my head.

I took him into the city yesterday to Rob's office to take you child to work day and he had a good time.  He got to ride on the bus and the LIRR.  He colored all day with Mommy and had pizza and ice-cream.  He liked it.  Needless to say I am tired and sore today.  My last treatment is on Monday.  Hooray!!

Almost Done

It's been a rough week and a half since the last chemo.  I am having problems dealing with it this time.  It started on chemo day.  My regular nurse practitioner was not available and they gave me someone new.  Then when I got into chemo and my regular chemo nurse was not available and I was not happy with the nurse I was given.  First, they didn't have a bed-type room with a window, only a closed one and I get very claustrophobic.  My regular nurse holds one for me even though they are not suppose to.  Since I got there so late from the first appointment, nothing was available with a window, so I opted for a chair with a window.  The chairs are very uncomfortable when you still have a hole in your stomach and a bad back.  The chairs are only closed by a curtain and it was very noisy.  The lady across from me had very loud visitors.  It was hard to relax.  I know this might seem petty, but when you expect certain things and it is already a difficult time, it doesn't help.

So finally, I get into the chair and the nurse tries to put the iv in and misses.  I go ouch and he says did that hurt?  HUH????  I said please get someone else.  You only get one chance.  I have bad veins.  I guess I insulted him.  He got someone else and they got it in after running my arm under hot water.  The rest of the treatment was ok.

After my treatment, I went to the plastic surgeon to see the nurse practitioner again as usual.  Rob picked me and mom up and we went home.

Overall, the side effects weren't strong, but I lost my taste buds longer this time.  I am still having problems tasting after a week and a half. I am tired with stomach upset, but overall not too bad.  Having Sean around helps since he gets me out of the house in the evening to play with him.  He still likes kissing my head saying it is scratchy.

Monday, I ran into the plastic surgeon before my appointment with the nurse practitioner. He is happy with what he has heard from her.  He would like my belly to heal on it's own.  I am ok with that.  I have about a 2 inch hole on the left.  The rest of the incision is closed and looks like I was opened with a rusty can opener.  I was thinking today that I probably wouldn't able to go swimming this summer with it open.

Almost done...

No Strep For Me

After having Sean home for two days, he is finally back at daycare today.  He threw up Monday night, fever on Tuesday and a rash on Wednesday.  I took him to the doctor on Wednesday because of the rash.  He was positive for strep.  They did a test on me too and it was negative.  This morning the rash on Sean was gone, but he said he didn't want to go to daycare.  I asked him why and he said he wanted to stay home and play with his toys and he will go tomorrow.  We finally got him dressed and off he went with Rob.

It was rough having him home, but it was also nice at the same time.  I am very tired today.  At least Rob didn't have to take off the time from work considering daycare is closed next week and a half for the holidays.  Rob will be home for a few of the days and I know now I can handle him.  I just also have to nap when Sean does or if he does.

Most of my side effects from this round of chemo are gone.  I am only tired with a slight upset GI.  I do have a rash on the back of my head, but I think that is more of the short hair, hats and couch than anything else.

Kisses

Not doing too bad.  Overnights seems to be the worst on how I am feeling physically.  This round isn't definitely not as bad as the first round.  I am very tired though.  I am happy to be half way done.

I was getting Sean ready for bed last night on his changing table.  He reaches over, grabs my head, pulls it down and gives me a big kiss on the top of my bald head and hugs me.  He says, "I like your hair, Mommy."  Cute, considering I don't have any, but it just melted my heart.  He then continued to give me more kisses.  It's nice to see it not bothering him.  We haven't made a big deal out of it, so I guess he won't either.

Side Effects Starting Again

This is the worse of it...knowing some of it is coming.  My throat is getting dry.  The nurse gave me some "magic mouthwash" (with Maalox and lidacane) this time.  I couldn't sleep very well last night.  My bad nerve in my stomach is hypersensitive. Neck is starting to hurt too, along with my gums.  At least I am half way done with my treatment and I am just about bald.  I don't have to worry about my hair coming out anymore.  Hopefully, it will be nice enough to sit outside in the fresh air.  I am also getting a visit from my parents, so I won't be home by myself all day, especially when I can't move too well.

Yesterday, I got out for a little while in the yard and watched Sean play t-ball.

Interesting to be bald

I can now see lots of scalp.  The little pieces of hair have mainly fallen out on top.  I have a little on the sides and back.  Rob thinks it is funny that he can pull out the little hairs with ease.  At least my hats aren't pulling on the little hairs.  It is a little more comfortable.

We went food shopping today in the rain  We also had a nice day with Sean.  Rob made brisket for dinner and Sean was so happy to have a chocolate chip cookie for dessert.  We listened were music and when Careless Whisper came on, Rob said, "yucky" and Sean said, "It's for dancing." and he started bopping back and forth.

Good day.


Tomorrow, I start my meds for my 2nd chemo treatment on Monday. I will half way done as of Monday!

Out & About

I got my wig fitted and cut today.  Still not happy with it because it is straight on top and wavy on the bottom.  Nothing like my regular style, but I probably won't wear too much anyway.  Mainly, I will use it for work and such.  I did by this little curly thing that sticks out the bottom of a hat.  I probably will wear that more.  I will take pictures of the different looks when Rob is home.

I treated myself to a mani/pedi today also.  I figured if I can get out of the house I will do it the Friday before my next treatment.  It will give me something nice to look forward to before the chemo on Monday.  I painted my nails a nice green in honor of St. Paddy's Day.

I also lost half of my stubble on my head today in the shower.  I figure most of it will be gone by Monday.  I can't wait for all of it to fall out because it makes a crunchy sound on my pillow (I did start wearing a hat to sleep in) and it is getting stuck on anything I wear on my head.  Sean was cute today and looked at my head and said, "Mommy, your hair is falling down."  This meant to him that I did not have hair and not that it was falling out.

Fabulously Bald

On Sunday, my hair started falling out from the chemo.  I got a bad headache before it started and my hair felt heavy.  I thought it was funny that I could just pull out handfuls of hair.  It was really weird.  I decided on Monday for Rob to shave my head.  We were going to have Sean help.  He watched a bit, but wasn't too interested.  He decided to read some books and keep crawling under the tripod since we were also video taping it.  It took a while because we were using Rob's mustache trimmer.  It worked though.  Rob tried giving me a mohawk first.  It wasn't too successful.  He also saved his favorite curl for last.  On Friday, I am going to get my wig fitted.

Getting started:

Rob attempting a mohawk: 

One Curl to Go:

All Done:

Feeling Better

Sorry it has taken so long to post.  It's been a rough few weeks.  I was feeling fine after the chemo until the 3rd day and it was downhill from there.  I was very sore in my neck, head and throat, tired, my teeth hurt, nothing tasted good and it hurt to eat.  I was feeling better on Saturday (Day 6), but in the evening my stomach/IBS was a wreck and I had severe back cramps and that was bad until Tuesday.  I also got a rash on my hands.  Everything I got were side effects.  Now I know what to expect for next time.

My belly is doing good.  I got some of the stitches out last Monday and the rest of them today.  The nurse practitioner was very happy with how it is looking.  I still have a hole in my belly about 2 inches by 1/2 inch  wide by 1/2 inch deep.  She said it will probably take at least another month for it to heal.  I am happy with that especially with what it looked like before.

Saturday night my head was hurting.  I thought it was from dinner.  I realized Sunday morning my hair was starting to come out and that is why my head was hurting.  So since it is coming out so much, I decided to shave it off tonight.  Rob is going to do it and we are going to have Sean help so he doesn't wake up in the morning and get scared of my bald head.  We figured if he watched and we explained to him what was happening, it would be better for him.  I will get a fitting for the wig later this week.

Pictures

We got our pictures done today. We had a nice time and Sean cooperated.

Sean

So Sean finally noticed my pump tonight. He saw the bubbles going through the tube and he asked "What's that?" I told him it was just bubbles. He was fine with that explanation and continued watching the bubbles for 5 minutes until it was time for bed. He did follow the tube to my stomach and tried lifting my shirt to see where it was going, but I was able to tell him he couldn't look there and he was OK. Then right before bed he wanted to see the bubbles and I told him that they were away. He is definitely going to notice it again, hopefully I can keep the explanation as bubbles.

Today was a bad mental day. Everything just piled up on me. Rob came home early and took me out for lunch. It was nice to get out without the baby, even with the flooding and sideways rain.