Eyes - Good News

I had my appointment with the ophthalmologist the other day.  We said the thickening of the macular space has improved slightly.   The cysts have not changed.  My eyesight in my left eyes might have improved also and she would like me to get my vision checked at the optometrist.

I go back and see the ophthalmologist in 3 months.

Hooray.  Stopping the tamoxifen was the right thing to do.

I have the oncologist next week.  Fingers crossed.

Short Hair

Very weird with the short hair.  When I went to wash it yesterday, I forgot how short it was and put the amount of shampoo I usually use on my long hair.  It was way too much.  The haircut is ok.  I am not crazy about it.  I think it is too long on the sides and it is hitting my ears, so I am putting in barrettes to pull it off my face.  It's not worth going back to get it fixed, since I will only have it for 3-4 weeks.

The belly wound is looking ok.  It doesn't seem to be opening this time.  The plastic surgeon put in a lot of stitches. It is going to take a long time to heal, especially when I start the chemo on Monday.

All Sewn Up Again

I went to the plastic surgeon again today.  He decided to close up everything.  He said he wasn't surprised that a few stitches had opened.  He liked the progress of the areas that were closed.  It took about an hour to reclose the wound and he did a nice job.  I know, after the chemo is done, I might need some touch up work, but I still have to have my breasts finished also.  His objective today was to get it closed, even if it did not look pretty. The belly is a little sore from today's work, but I am still having a problem with one of the nerves that runs from the incision up my belly.  I don't know if I had mentioned it before, but is the source of most of my pain and lack of movement.  The right side of my belly burns from the nerve being oversensitive. Hopefully now that the wound is closed, the nerve can heal.  He is having me massage the areas 5 times a day to desensitize it.

I am also able to get rid of the visiting nurse.  She was coming every day while the wound was open and 3 times a week when Fred was attached.  I found out the other day that I was getting charged $40 co-pay on every visit.  The total bill is probably going to be about $1000...blech.  I am trying to work out a payment plan with them, since I am still unemployed.  The doctor said that I can email him a picture of the wound everyday so he can keep an eye on it instead of the visiting nurse for infection.  If any stitches open up or there are any problems, he will give me and Rob something easy to do so we don't have to get the nurse back.

The doctor gave the ok to start chemo on Monday.  He said even though I am closed, it will still take a long time for the wound to fully heal and to expect that.  Chemo delays healing.  I am glad thought I can finally get that started.  My chemo will be every 3 weeks and I will be having 4 treatments.

Tomorrow, I am getting my haircut finally.  I will post pics tomorrow.

Belly Problems Again

The visiting nurse was just here and we measured the wound on my belly and it definitely opened more, which I knew already. The center opening is now 5cm by 2cm and one of the side ones is 5cm by 1cm. We called the plastic surgeon and he wasn't surprised about it opening and losing stitches. He wants to see me tomorrow, so I changed my haircut appointment for Wednesday.

I am still hoping to start the chemo on Monday.

Follow-up With Plastic Surgeon

I had my follow-up appointment with the plastic surgeon to check my belly wound.   The nurse saw me today, since the doctor was in surgery. Two of the three areas that the doctor left open are now closed.  I have a 1 inch hole in the center that is still draining. It is also a little red, so they are changing me to a stronger antibiotic because of that and a low grade fever.  She was overall happy with the rest of the wound.  It still needs to be fully healed for me to start chemo.  I am going back next week to see her and then the doctor on the day of the chemo.  I am going to email her pics of the wound every day so they can keep an eye on it.  That made me feel a little better about the visiting nurse not coming everyday.

Tomorrow, my mom and sister are coming over to help me watch Sean, since Rob has to help out his mom.  My sister is bringing my little nephew too.  It will be a nice day and Sean will enjoy playing with his cousin.  He adores Liam.

No More Fred

It was nice to finally get rid of Fred, the sucking wound vacuum. He did his job.  The plastic surgeon was happy with the healing so far.  His ideal situation would let it close on it's own to prevent infection, but he did not want me to delay chemo because of it.  I have to be healed to start chemo because chemo slows down healing.  It took about an hour to close the wound.  He cleaned the wound, numbed the area, sewed me up and left 3 openings for drainage.  I am limited on lifting and activity for several days, but he said my body will let me know when I can do more.  I am back on pain killers.  My belly is very sore and tight.  I got another tummy tuck from this procedure since so the wound was so wide.  I have to go back on antibiotics for 10 days again and the visiting nurse is still going to come 3 times a week to keep an eye on the healing.  I am going back to the plastic surgeon on Friday for them to check it as well.  He said that we will probably have to do some fixing of the wound after chemo, but I still have to have my breasts finished as well.  I knew that wasn't going to be done until after the chemo.  I can't wait for the belly & breast to be healed to see how my clothing will fit and maybe have to get some nice new clothing.  :)  At least I have something to look forward to after the chemo.

Rob will now be home tomorrow since daycare is going to be closed for the snow.  That will be helpful since I am having problems moving around again.  Hopefully, we will get some snow tonight so the boys can play in it tomorrow.

Time to Get Closed

Tomorrow, I am finally having my belly sewn up so I can start chemo.  They decided to do it in the doctor's office, so no anesthesia.  The nurse said I won't feel anything, which I haven't when they were cleaning up the wound.  I can't wait to get rid of "Fred" the sucking wound vac.

Here is a picture of me and Fred for the last time:

All Cleaned Up

After waiting 2 1/2 hours for my appointment, I finally got to see the doctor. He was very optimistic about the mess on my belly & said is a common complication that can be easily fixed with no issue. He then kicked my mom & Rob out of the room. (They wanted to see this part.) He & the nurse cleaned up the belly & cut away all the bad & dead tissue. He then cauterized the gash which the nurse told me now looks like a large hole. She told me to try to not to look at it. The doctor said that the wound won't smell now, which I was glad to hear. The smell of dead skin on your own body is pretty gross. The doctor advised me that when he does stitch me up, my stomach is going to be even flatter since he had to cut so much tissue out. I have to go back to see the doctor on Thursday to either be sewn up or given a wound vac. Since I don't know the time yet, I am going to change my oncology appointment. One good thing about the surgery is my new breast looks beautiful & the doctor was very happy with the results. I am happy too.

After the appointment, I was feeling pretty good. The wound itself didn't smell & felt a little better. It was a long day though. Today, I am feeling a little anxious about the wound & showering. I don't know if I am going to be able to do it. Rob & Sean left to do errands & nurse will be here before they get back. So I don't know if I want to try and do it myself today.

The doctor did tell me I was allowed out in public places, so Rob said if I was up for it, we would go out for dinner & get me out of the house. Getting out of the house would be nice.

Waiting

So tomorrow is the big day. I finally get to see the plastic surgeon. Hopefully he will be able to give me some reassuring news. Mom & Dad are taking me into the city & Rob will meet us there, since he is back at work. My appointment is for 11:45. I hope he won't be too backed up.

I had a new visiting nurse today, since my regular one is on vacation for a week. She took one look at my belly and said, "That's bad." Really? I didn't know that. She was nice though. She explained this device called a wound vac. She said the Dr would probably clean up and remove all the dead, black tissue and then sew me up with the wound vac in. It is a vacuum that is inserted into the wound to suck out anything bad in it. She said it helps the wound heal very quickly. I hope the doctor does something. I can't wait for this gaping hole to heal on it's own.

Oncologist

I made an appointment with an oncologist at NYU Cancer Center for next Thursday. I have to wait for the oncatype DX results, so that appointment might be changed. I tried to make another one at Beth Israel, but they don't take my insurance right now. They are under negotiations for the new year. My friend is looking into seeing if the doctor will see me anyway. I am also looking into another doctor on the island.

The nurse said my belly is starting to look good. Slow, but it is healing. I can't wait for my appointment on Friday.

On My Own

Today I am by myself for the morning. Tomorrow Rob is going back to work. Rob had me shower yesterday by myself. It was OK until I had to touch my gaping hole in my belly to find the gauze the nurse had packed in there. I did get it all, but it freaked me out. I haven't looked at it yet, but touching it has reaffirmed that I shouldn't.

I woke up this morning with pain on my heel. I realized that my heels were so dry that it split open. I guess not moisturizing and walking much has killed my feet. :( I will have to bandage it good so it won't get infected.

So looking forward to my Dr appointment on Friday.

Stuck in the House

I wish I could go out. I wish my belly would heal. At least it is less than a week until my appointment. It would nice to have more visitors.

The exercises are really difficult, but I know if I don't do them I will lose mobility in my left arm. So I do them. Rob keeps trying to encourage me and tells me that if I don't do them I won't get my yummy dinner. Push through the pain.

Visiting Nurse

The visiting nurse is now coming every day. She checked the wound in my belly and found it worse since last time she saw it. She made a new report for the belly and released the checking of the breast. The belly wound has gotten wider and deeper. It is 3cm deep in one area on the right. This might be why I might have the pain on the right side. The nurse is going to come every day now until I see my plastic surgeon on the 15th. I am not allowed in any public places until the open wound is closed. Since it is so cold out, I am limited to the apartment. At least I am not in the hospital.

Yesterday was nice though. My mom's friend, Ruth, got us a cleaning lady. It nice to have a nice clean house.

Good Day

I had the appointment with the surgeon today. She is very happy with the look of the breast and even gave me exercises to start today to get my arm mobility back. She checked my belly and the redness was lower than the line was yesterday. She said I was OK enough not to need the IV antibiotics. The visiting nurse is suppose to start coming everyday, so she should be able to keep an eye on it. The doctor also suggested that the plastic surgeon clean up the belly and close it up. We will be discussing that with him next week. I really don't want to have this open wound for weeks, since I am not allowed in public places while I have it. It limits where I am allowed to go.

Other than that, we are hanging in there. We thank everyone for their thoughts and well wishes. Rob is going back to work next week and I will be good next week to be by myself.

My next appointment is for the plastic surgeon next Friday.

Problems Healing

I had my appointment with the plastic surgeon today. Since my surgeon is still on vacation, I saw one of his associates. She was very nice. She said the breast is healing beautifully, which we already knew. She examined my belly and was not happy with how it is healing. I have a 4-6 inch opening in my belly that is about 1/2 inch deep. She changed the dressing type and gave me stronger antibiotics. She also drew a line on my belly where it is red and if the new antibiotics do not shrink it or if it goes above the line tomorrow, I have to go back into the hospital for a few days of IV antibiotics. If everything looks OK at tomorrow's appointment, then I will see my plastic surgeon on the 15th and discuss whether to leave it heal or go in for out patient surgery to clean the opening and close it up.

We will know more tomorrow.